Thursday, February 14, 2008

Uma Thurman to star with Steroid Monkey

In a shocking revelation it came to my knowledge that Uma Thurman is to star in a movie with Steroid Monkey as its male lead. The movie is to be directed by Vishal Bhardwaj, based on the life of the actress of yester years, Nadira. The monkey, which cannot act even if his life depended on it is rumored to be quite excited at the prospect of working with the lovely Uma. Fans of Miss Thurman came across the astounding piece of news while browsing her wikipedia page. The actress who has worked with the likes of Ethan Hawke and John Travolta, doesnt understand the implications of choosing to work with Mr. Monkey. Maybe it is the prospect of money which made her take such a step, but fans believe if she comes across some of the works by the demented expression-less bollywood clod she would think once again about the role.

What the fuck is wrong with Uma Thurman? I cant for the life of me believe that the actress I adored in movies like Gattaca and Pulp Fiction would rub shoulders with Hrithik Klutz Roshan. Ohhh, Et Tu, Karuna.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

New Species Found

New lizard species: A new lizard species has been found in Satara. The
lizard, Hemidactylus Sataraensis, can’t climb walls or stick to
ceilings.

Sigh. Lucky fucking lizard. Its inability to do normal things in lizard-kind has made the front page news. I wish even my inabilities could be identified and documented with pomp and glee. They can even put me under observation, as long as they feed me and keep discovering newer inabilities. The headlines can read something like:

New Human Species: A new human specimen has been found in mumbai. The Human, Procrastinatus Permanentsis, can't do hard work or concentrate for long periods of time. Dies in extremely competitive environments.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

They are leaving me behind

The tramp moves on to the end of the street
I listen to the echo of his hobnail feet
For some there’s a future to find
But I think they’re leaving me behind.

The world hurries on at it’s breakneck pace
People fly by in their lifelong race
For them there’s a future to find
But I think they’re leaving me behind.

The chances they come, but the chances have been lost
Success can be gained, but at too great a cost
For some there’s a future to find
But I think they’re leaving me behind.

The wind sweeps up and goes back to it’s tree
The rain flows by and moves to the sea
For them there’s a future to find
But I think they’re leaving me behind.

Nick Drake